Don't Cry For Me

 Okay. So, I kind of just dove right into that last post without any pre-amble! (Which is so unlike me!) I'm feeling a bit under the weather today; (too many tasty snacks while watching the Superbowl with the fam last night, I think!) and just wanted to get to it. But.. that's not the right way to start a blogging day, dear friends! Happy Valentine's Day! Despite the extreme cold here in the city, I am bundled up and ready to read.. and write; of course. Haha.

When I got home from dropping the kiddos off for school, I bundled up under a cozy blanket with a cup of coffee, and the rest of my book. Just for you guys! I mean, what kind of person would I be if I only reviewed one book this week!? So, I sucked it up (*rolls eyes*) and finished what was a wonderfully heartbreaking novel.

First off? I have to thank my friend MB for sharing this novel with me; as she chose it for her book of the month, and thought it sounded like something I would read. Don't Cry For Me is written through a father's letters on his deathbed to his estranged gay son. That premise alone grabbed at me, because I think everyone has something to atone for at their end. Jacob is a black man who is telling stories from his life to his son Isaac in an attempt to explain why he could never be the supportive and loving father that Isaac deserved. There are scenes that made me angry. Scenes that made me cry. 

Jacob lays it all bare. Telling Isaac some of the darkest secrets of his life, in order to explain who he truly is, and how he was raised. This book is all about nature vs nuture, when it comes down to it. Being raised in the country in the 40s as a poor black man; Jacob is exposed to a different sort of upbringing than his son might understand. Jacob tells stories that shine light on his own homophobia; and on the mistreatment of his wife. While these stories will have your heart breaking; he is telling his shameful, whole truth. After becoming a reader in his later years, Jacob can view his own behavior from a different perspective. 

He is not looking for forgiveness, merely explaining and apologizing to his son. He recognizes where he made his mistakes, and is bringing them to the fore front. Not an easy task, and one that only the strong can undertake to begin with. I highly doubt most people at the end of their road are fully confronting the misery inducing parts of themselves. He is not asking for pity - he says not to cry for him - but he is hoping to lift the burden of pain from his son by acknowledging it.

I loved reading about the growth in Jacob from the time he was a child, to the end of his life. I feel like this book makes you look inside of yourself; and those closest to you. Makes you take a closer look. By no means an easy read - but a truly enjoyable one. The pages flew by. Thanks again to my girl MB for steering me toward it!

Until next week! Stay cozy.